id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
