The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Randomize
