We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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