I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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