We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
