Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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