I heard we made out
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize