Got a toothbrush?
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Randomize
