I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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