I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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