Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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