I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize