I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
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