This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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