Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize