Will you blow on my dice?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize