i love accidental penises.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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