He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
