He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?