How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.