No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize