Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Food network will be on but we won't be watching

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  O by "watching" I mean "background noise"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Food network will be on but we won't be watching (1-248): O by "watching" I mean "background noise" http://tfl.nu/n3tt
  Replies (2) Good night (1033) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe". http://tfl.nu/cnav
  Replies (7) Good night (2485) Bad night (739)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.

  (1-727): View more from Florida

  shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened. (1-727): shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face. http://tfl.nu/dien
  Replies (13) Good night (4575) Bad night (1023)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke. http://tfl.nu/qku8
  Replies (8) Good night (929) Bad night (3666)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness. http://tfl.nu/2r5a
  Replies (20) Good night (3973) Bad night (861)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops. http://tfl.nu/nf4z
  Replies (9) Good night (4227) Bad night (850)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now http://tfl.nu/uorn
  Replies (9) Good night (1019) Bad night (3593)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  i think he saw me take a picture of his dick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): i think he saw me take a picture of his dick http://tfl.nu/2fdf
  Replies (6) Good night (2467) Bad night (770)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere. http://tfl.nu/0uwm
  Replies (9) Good night (949) Bad night (2034)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick. http://tfl.nu/yu0a
  Replies (9) Good night (1705) Bad night (855)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today. http://tfl.nu/im22
  Replies (11) Good night (493) Bad night (2387)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy. http://tfl.nu/lqb9
  Replies (5) Good night (1309) Bad night (537)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god http://tfl.nu/pepn
  Replies (7) Good night (802) Bad night (429)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY. http://tfl.nu/gw0u
  Replies (3) Good night (552) Bad night (211)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo http://tfl.nu/y87c
  Replies (5) Good night (302) Bad night (580)

Randomize