just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize