sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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