i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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