Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
