I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
