she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize