he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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