Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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