So drunk its hurt
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I smell like Dick and happiness
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize