i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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