on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions