We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
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