i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
