i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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