I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
