so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I wish I only lived at night.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
