I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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