He is such a slut. More and more my type.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
i came on her dog
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
