Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
