i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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