He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
