She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
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