how hairy? two words: wookie tits
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Randomize
