i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
