According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
It was confusing and full of hummus
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
