you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
