dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
is wine microwaveable?
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
