i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
