is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
