It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
