what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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